Band Meeting(wip)

Now that he thought about it, this might be the first time he had ever been the one to call one. He wiped his sweaty palms on his pants, he could already predict how annoyed with him Ximena was going to be. She never liked Starla in the first place and this news was going to set her off, he just knew it. He didn't know how Styx was going to react, and that also made him nervous. Overall, he was expecting the worst, and he would prefer not to tell them about such a personal matter but it could affect the future of the band so he had to let them know what was going on.

So you both must be wondering why I've gathered you here today, he started.

Roy, don't be fucking annoying just tell us what the band meeting is about. Ximena was always quick to cut to the chase.

He fidgeted in his seat. Okay, okay, he put his hands up passively, well, you guys all know Starla, right? Styx nodded and Ximena wrinkled her nose but said nothing. Well, Roy continued, Star and I have sorta, kinda gotten ourselves into a situation that could potentially affect the future of the band.

What kind of situation? Spit it out already! Ximena was already losing her patience.

Um. Well. I guess... I don't really know how to say it! I think... I probably got Starla pregnant. Recently.

God DAMMIT, Roy! There was that explosion he expected! Ximena reached for one of the discarded beer cans littering their coffee table and threw it at him as hard as she could. It bounced off the top of his head before he could even put his arms up to block it.

Hey! What the hell-

What the fuck is wrong with you, are you a fucking animal? You couldn't use a fucking condom? You can't just go around and knock up every groupy that stumbles backstage! She chucked another can at him.

Starla is on the pill! I didn't need one! This time he was able to get his arms up and cover his head as an onslaught of garbage was flung at him.

Yeah, she says she's on the pill!

She is! And she's not some groupie, she's my girlfriend!

No she isn't! Eventually Ximena ran out of things to throw. She unclenched her jaw and leaned back on the couch, slamming her boots on the coffee table's now clear surface. Roy hesitantly lowered his arms and peeked up at her. She looked... almost apathetic. Like she wasn't just screaming and throwing things seconds ago. Doesn't your little girlfriend sleep around? 'Girlfriend' being said in a mocking tone.

That's the thing, Roy was talking with his hands now, she told me she hasn't been with anyone else but me for, like, at least a year. He smiled a bit, that revelation was still new to him and it made him feel... special.

Ximena let out a loud bark of laughter. Her expression was one of mocking pity, as if she was talking to a child. Roy, you don't really believe that, do you?

What? Of course I do? I don't get what you mean.

I mean, Starla is playing you. It's obvious. She got knocked up and has no idea who the father is, so she's just picking whichever guy is dumb enough to believe it's his so she can sponge off of him forever.

What? No... she wouldn't do that... but Roy sounded less confident.

It's what I would do. Ximena said with a shrug.

That's a good point and all, Styx's voice made Roy jump, he had forgotten she was there at all with how quiet she was, but if that was really the case, why would she pick Roy? He's flat broke, doesn't have a real job, doesn't have a car, and he sleeps on a couch. I'm sorry cuz I don't know who else she's seeing but Roy has to be the absolute bottom of the barrel if she's digging for gold. No offense.

Styx's words shouldn't have made Roy as happy as they did but he couldn't stop the smile from creeping on his face. She was completely right, he's a loser, and no girl would willingly want to be saddled with a kid with him. He pointed a finger in Ximena's direction, see? Just because it's something you'd do doesn't mean everyone else in the world is a lying bitch who-

Styx waved her hand to stop Roy there before the whole thing devolved into a screaming match. Knock it off.

Roy huffed and then leaned back into the recliner, looking away from both of them. It doesn't really matter anyways, we're still figuring things out, but I don't want to be a dad and she doesn't want to be a mom so we aren't keeping it. I was just telling you guys because I might miss a few practices or something with all this going on.

If Roy was being honest with himself, he wasn't even sure if that was true. He started picking at his nail polish, a nervous habit. Star did say she didn't want to be a mom... but maybe she only said that because he said he didn't want to be a dad first. It's not that he would abandon Star if she decided to keep the baby, and he told her that, but when he did she immediately brought up adoption.

Roy was... uncomfortable with the idea of a child of his being out in the world that he would never know, what if they feel like I abandoned them? What if they look for me one day? Roy never knew his mom and the question of why didn't you want me? never truly left his mind, even in adulthood. Starla understood his feelings. When they got to discussing abortion, Star became uneasy. I know it's not really a baby yet. I know that. But I feel... I don't know Roy. I just don't think I could do it. And Roy understood her feelings and told her he wouldn't make her and he wouldn't bring it up again. In the end Starla left his place with tears in her eyes and Roy at a loss for what else to say. He just needed to talk to her again, they would figure it out. She's his star, afterall.

You know what? That's smart. Roy was jostled from his thoughts by Ximena's... unexpected agreement? You would be a terrible father.

That caught him off guard and it must have been visible on his face because_. He didn't expect her words to hurt, but they did. He tried to keep his tone light but it came out forced, what? Ximena? No I wouldn't.

Your dad was shitty, right? Guys who have shitty dads grow up to be shitty dads.

That is not true, Styx found it important to intervene again, Ximena, get real.

Sure it is. My grandpa was a piece of shit and it made my dad a piece a shit, and now both of my brothers are pieces of shits too.

Yeah, but... I wouldn't be like that. Roy's voice became quiet. His dad was awful, he made his childhood miserable. He would never be that kind of person. It's not like he thought he would be the world's best dad but... he wouldn't be a bad dad, would he?

I'm not saying you'd hit your kid or anything, but you'd fuck 'em up for sure. Just look around at where we live, look at how you dress. You're not dad material.

She was right, this apartment was no place for a kid. Trash everywhere, too many people living in such a small cramped space. Dishes piled up in the kitchen, the bong that was a permanent fixture in the living room, the rat that everyone knows lives under the stove but haven't been able to catch. There's nothing wrong with how I dress, he mumbled.